Sunday, October 29, 2006

Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrr....

Turning the clocks back is a more significant sign of winter's arrival than anything nature could invent. It's darker. It's colder. You want to stay in your jammies all day and not pierce the insulated skin of your new double-paned windows. In fact, that's just about how my day went, except for venturing out to get a few more volumes of Lost's first season (What happened to Clare??? Don't tell me!!). Another sign was dashing out my back door to bring my precious jade plants in for the winter. They had a very productive summer outside and have grown significantly. Now it's time to lay low and watch the days tick by until that spring equinox breaches the horizon again.

I have to give big props to Suzanne who drove up to Snohomish for another installation of the Seattle Cyclocross Series. While I was enjoying the extra hour of sleep in my flannel pjs she was out there warming up in the rain and MUD and exhibiting extreme fortitude. I hoist my hot cocoa to thee, Suzanne!

Last night Rhi, Ashley, Davis and I did the Messmanless Messquarade race. Our team was Heff and the Bunnies, complete with smoking jacket, pipe, bunny tails, bunny ears, and a big blue tandem dinosaur. Rhi and Ashley put on the Bunny charm and snagged us a huge pumpkin from Mama's Mexican Kitchen in Belltown. That was worth extra points and brought us up to 3rd place overall. Bunny Power!

On Thursday I was thinking about getting out and overnighting somewhere in the hills, but saw that a cold front was moving through Sat night and thought better of it. Good call. Today so much snow fell @ Snoqualmie Pass that the DOT had to shut down the Pass eastbound and westbound for a few hours. Sometimes listening to myself pays off.

Now it's on to November, my least favorite month of the year, although it was made quite tolerable last year thanks to my favorite bearded fellow. Only 2 months til I land in India. Save some stars for me!

Saturday, October 28, 2006

Anniversary Limerick

It was this time last year
I met someone quite dear
On my first ride, it was Seatac
Not knowing it was magic
That love grows from bikes and beer.

Last Halloween I was a nun
Racing around town was great fun
A masked man on our team
Cleverly planning his scheme
To learn if this girl was the one

We had both done a bike tour
Which led to talking much more
On this second night that we met
He said "Let's go to Tibet"
Of him in my life I could not be more sure

Now a post-doc he's far away
But we're in touch every day
This year will be a blip
With the help of a long trip
If he finds me a pink sari I might stay!

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

All hike, no bike

I've been feeling extremely burned out with bikes this month. Sometimes a person just needs a break from something so consuming in one's life. So the past few weeks I've put on my trail shoes and headed out to the woods. The first hike was just up Tiger Mountain, about 5 miles round trip and 2500ft gain. Back when I was really nuts, I used to hike Tiger twice, back to back, up the really steep trails, with about 40# in my pack. That, I felt, was an adequate workout. Now that I've come to my senses a bit more I merely head out to hike when it's pouring buckets of rain instead. Soaked all the way through so my feet sloshed as I plod along, I still had a smile on my face. The ferns were there. And lots of trees. One banana slug. And quiet. Lots of quiet. There was the physical quiet: No cars, no traffic, no city buzz. And then there was the mental quiet: No defensive riding, no heightened senses ready to make you spring, no wondering if I could push a bigger gear, no self-admonishing for not racing all the CX races this year. It was good to be in a different environment where I could take a break from.....myself.

This weekend's weather promised to be the one fall weekend to remember all year. The leaves were at their most brilliant, the skies were clear, and the sun warmed the earth up just enough for us to think winter might not come this year. So Mary, Izzy, and I met at the Alpental parking lot for an easy hike up to Source Lake through the Denny Creek drainage. It's by far one of the most popular day hikes around, which is probably why I managed to avoid it all these years, but this day the trail called to me. I'd been up the drainage a few times in the winter and today I wanted to see what it looked like in its fall glory. The parking lot was packed and people strolled around in the bright sun, either coming back or leaving for the trail. I actually enjoyed seeing and chatting with all the people. Something about being around all these people who shared the same energy for a beautiful day. There were old people, young people, buff people, and every kind of ordinary people. Even 2 wiener dogs with the fastest little legs you've ever seen.

The trail was far more lovely than I'd imagined. For such a high use area, the trail managed to appear new and well kept, unlike other high use trails like Tiger or Si where the path seems as worn and ugly as pavement. We didn't have to go far to find the reddest of maples beneath the bluest of skies.



The ferns at the foot of the maples were turning a noble shade of brown, getting ready for their own long, cold sleep. We passed through a few small streams and Izzy dunked her head down to take some long sips. Mary and I looked up at the peaks and recalled traverses up Pineapple Pass to the Tooth and other backcountry marathon tales. They weren't even that long ago! Why does it seem that all that energy has escaped us? It's like we've aged 30 years in 3.

After a few miles we finally we reached the rocky hillside overlooking Source Lake. What a wonderful view! A long drainage full of evergreens and spotted with red and yellow trees and a small lake complementing the scene like a fine jewel.



We pulled out our lunches and enjoyed the bright afternoon sun. Mary managed to spot 4 climbers coming down from Guye Peak so we watched them pick their way down "the obvious descent gully" which was a long rocky gully and onto an equally rocky boulder field. No my knees don't miss that a bit.

The sun started its descent over the western peaks and left us in a cold shadow, so we took that as a sign to get back in the sun and down the trail. Izzy led the way and insisted on combing through the blueberry bushes to find anything the bears may have left.



At one point I turned around to see the valley we had just left and saw this:



It appeared like a magical green kingdom whose tree limbed doors we were about to close. I imagined coming back to the mountains on a weekend like this and climbing up higher and deeper into the backcountry and staying for days. Just me and my man and the treasures around us. For now I'll close my eyes and imagine it, and wait until we can be there together.

Friday, October 20, 2006

Rosemary update

Got Rosemary back from the doctor this week. His diagnosis: 4 degrees off in geometry. Drats to his perfection! He had to go and get the old Bridgestone catalogs and measure every angle to see where she sits. I stared at him with big, concerned, motherly eyes and a lump in my throat and asked "Is she still ridable??" He nodded confidently, but with the caveat that she'd be built more as a chopper. "So I can still ride her?" Optimism quickly grew in my voice. He shook his head 'yes' again and said I'd need to get new forks with a higher rake to offset her new geometry. He assured me that this wasn't a catastrophic failure event, so I grabbed my little girl and took her home before the doctor could change his mind.

A new fork. That's do-able! I can get a new fork. I can ride her again. Not for 100 miles, but that's ok....just around town and to work and a few lazy days in the sun. My little girl has a chance at living again.

But not yet. Mama's got a few other financial issues to deal with. So for now she's kanoodling in the corner with Freki. They look quite happy there together and I wouldn't want to disturb them just yet. It'll be time to wake her up again soon enough.

Take me now

Something super special came in the mail this week:



My tickets to see my Sweetness in India this winter! I'll have 5 weeks to sleep in, nuzzle, ramble around, feed cookies to a dog named Stumpy, savor new smells and sounds, absorb a new culture, see old constellation friends, ride a few camels, and climb out of my shell that I've been nesting in far too long.

The great big towel

Admitting weakness. This is the hardest part. You're supposed to be invincible, mind over matter. You try and it doesn't work. You try again and it really doesn't work. Your body tries to whisper and you turn up the music. No. Never. Knock it off. When is it in your best interest to throw in the towel? Before disaster strikes again? Before it's too late and you're deep in the hole for 3 more months? Or do you wake up with clear mind and have another go, refusing to admit what your body yearns for you to hear?

I'm so torn. So stubbornly torn. On one hand I'm not a quitter and stronger than oak, but on the other hand I've been so humbled and shown the muddy puddle to lie in, that I don't want to go back there.

But...but...but...

I wish I could wake up and be invincible again. The strategist in me might have to admit it's not this year and let the others have their turn. Save the power for another chance in the sun. The gluttonous part of me wants it all again right now. Mine.

Or not.

I think I need a little Sinead louder than bombs to clear my head.



Ah yes. MUCH better. But the towel is still gripped in my hands.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Science!!

This amazing computer animation of cellular activity makes me feel like I went to school 200 years ago, back when they used Tinker Toys to explain DNA. What are kids studying these days? So rad.

It also makes me wonder what kind of happy dance my cells do after I eat a pint of Ben and Jerry's.

Cellular Visions: The Inner Life of a Cell

Friday, October 06, 2006

My little girl

pink bike full of life
craves full attention from mom
jealously weaves spell

autumn sun so warm
driving home lulled into space
CRACK: heartbreak above

forks bent like noodles
pink paint wrinkled on steel lugs
greetings, disaster

r&e first hope
snooty and a king's ransom
more tears in my beer

a real hero found
subject: sad bridgestone needs help
reply: let's fix her

fairy godfather
help my little girl be well
signed, a mom's sad tale

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Being force fed broccoli

Anyone who knows me well knows that broccoli has the effect of kryponite on me (as in Superman, not the bike lock). Never in my life have I been able to be in the same room as the vile vegetable, or any of its cruciferous family members. It reeks, it makes me gag, and when it's being steamed god help me find HEPA filter stat.

I raced at South Seatac this past weekend and after seeing pictures of me suffering for 3 long laps, Zack said my facial expressions looked like I was "being force fed broccoli." It was probably the hardest race I've ever done. I had to run. A lot. The sand seemed to have crept further into the park. A lot. They threw in an extra run-up that made me want to throw up. A lot. It was fast, it was relentless. I got lapped by Denny's duct taped punk ass (rock!). If it weren't for Jane making a special guest appearance in one brief corner of the singletrack, I would have crawled under a tree and wept at how pathetic I was feeling that day. I have no idea why. I didn't have an ounce of competitiveness, not a wisp of fire, no nails to chew on. But Jane inspired me on and helped me visualize passing a few more girls. By the last lap a bit of my old self was back and I chased down a few girls one by one. They seemed to drop like flies, esp the ones who had started so strong. It certainly wasn't my old form from last year where I'd start from the back and pick them off one-by-one until I was in the top 5. No, this year I have yet to crack the top 10. Maybe the girls are just that much stronger this year. Two of them were upgraded to Cat 3 after Sunday, so maybe that will give me some space to move up next time and to find my fire again.

Monday, October 02, 2006

Susanne's Memorial Ride

I mentioned something the other day about life's preciousness. It got even more precious this week with the tragic passing of a young woman who was struck by a van during her morning commute to Outdoor Research. I attended her memorial ride on Friday and it was a testiment to the love that flows between family, friends, and strangers. Bikes were decorated with flowers. Her family made tshirts with her image and ones that said, "We'll miss you Sus...Ride on." People tied black lace ribbons to their arms or bikes. We rode around the city for the regular CM ride, then most continued on to the intersection in West Seattle where the accident occured. It was a beautiful gathering of hundreds of people, mostly on bikes, carrying candles and placing flowers and tokens on the ground. Afterwards part of the group moved on to Alki Point where her family held a more intimate memorial with her dad, cousin, and friends telling stories about Susanne's life. They are a tightly knit, spiritual family. I had the honor of giving her husband a bottle of red wine at Alki Point. He told me that red wine was Susanne's favorite and that pink was her favorite color. If she'd seen my bike she would have talked about it for days. I didn't know Susanne or her husband or her friends. I wanted to show up to give them the love and caring that I've seen so abundant in the bike community. What else could a stranger do? We're a small group and we look out for each other.

Live every day with mass amounts of love. Ride on and be safe out there.